Letter To The Editor

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Another Letter To The Editor

Every now and then, Editor-in-Chief- Kristoffer Kenison- will
respond to a random question sent from a random reader.

Mr. Kristoffer Kenison or Current Resident:

We attempted to drop a package off today at [address removed for privacy.] No one was home. A signature is required to receive your package.

We will attempt to drop the package off tomorrow between 8:30 a.m. and 7:45 p.m. If you are unable to sign for your package, you will have to pick it up at our U.P.S. Shipping and Receiving Center. Your local U.P.S. Shipping and Receiving Center is located in Macon, Georgia, behind the Waffle House.

Thank you, and have a good day.

Your local U.P.S. Delivery Man,
Gus

__________________________________________________

-Kristoffer Kenison's Response:
Unfortunately, Gus, I will be screwing your wife from 8:30 a.m. to 7:45 p.m. tomorrow. And yes it will take that long, because your wife is hideous and I will have to get very drunk first. Then I will have to strain to remain aroused while choking back vomit. Then, as I finally finish the old bag off, I will, in fact vomit. I will then package this vomit and send it to you, via Federal Express.

P.S. I have something that Brown can do for me.

But I have to whisper it to you. Come closer.

Closer.

And while you do that, I'll also be doing your inbred daughter. In the butt. And that, that is what Brown can do for me.

Got a question for Editor-In-Chief Kristoffer Kenison? Click here.